The Week In Review

*Whoever assumes office in May as Nigeria's next President has a lot of work to do. That is a given. Forget about all the dandy campaign promises to either consolidate or change. The economy is in shambles due to forces now beyond Nigeria's immediate control vis-a-vis the sustained global fall in oil prices. One commendable thing about this government, in my opinion, is the dexterity which which the magnitude of the problem has been downplayed so far. The average Nigerian is totally oblivious of the dark days the country will soon face. I know this for a fact from the public discourses that have trailed the two major contestants. The nature of the issues people base their arguments for and against the candidates shows you how simple-minded and shallow Nigerians can be. 

This aside, any Nigerian President who wishes to lead Nigeria and isn't entirely sure just how much work he has on his hands should pay attention now. If you do not understand just arduous the task that faces the next resident of Aso Rock is, please visit Punch Newspapers online. Strange? Relax, I'll explain. 

When you find the newspaper online, click on any random story that is remotely about Nigeria and don't bother reading the content under the headline. Just scroll down to the bottom of the page and read the following comments section. It is at this point that you get a feel of just how deep Nigeria's problems are. Comments made by everyday Nigerians.

There was a headline some weeks ago about bird flu in some states like Kano, Ogun and some others I cannot immediately recall now. To my utmost surprise, a totally random story like this ended up with comments about how APC was better than PDP and how God was punishing APC State Governors with bird flu for their many transgressions. I was totally befuddled. How on Earth did bird flu connect to Kwankwanso and Jonathan I wondered. 

The distrust in the land at the moment is probably at an unprecedented level. Nigerians are so mind-screwed and emotionally damaged that they find a way to eventually connect the most remote headline in the news to politics and it is utterly absurd. You can have a headline that reads 'Mickey Mouse and Minny Mouse move next door to Daffy Duck in Disneyland' and the comments will be...

'SaiGMB2015 - just the way the man from otuoke will move out of aso rock #SaiBuhari'

'ForwardNigeria2019 - you're a big fool! he's not going anywhere till 2019'

'SaiGMB2015- your mother is a big fool. idiot'

'kenetheboy - useless president. see his wife talking anyhow'

And the tirades keep pouring in till you can't read anymore. You begin to wonder why Mickey Mouse just didn't remain where it was jeje.

It hasn't really helped that those in charge of the campaign for both parties act in the most jejune manner and keep bickering like schoolgirls fighting over Barbie dolls. Another day, another idiotic accusation and an even more idiotic rejoinder. I listened to Olisah Metuh and Lai Mohammed, the spokespersons of the two main parties, yesterday and I was deeply ashamed. When you throw in Femi Fani-Kayode into that mix, it becomes clear why 'ordinary' Nigerians think and make online newspaper comments the way they do. 

Nigeria's next President is going to have a lot of bridges to build and with the many other  issues he has to attend to i.e. social infrastructure, security and the economy, I would advise him to quickly murder sleep before he resumes office. Nigeria is lean on trust at the moment. Every action and utterance is perceived to have an undertone and nerves are on the edge all across the land. We are going to need more than national conferences to address it. 

Please do not ask me how. I wish I had the answer.

**During the week, the rich also cried in Lagos and they cried quite loudly. We were reminded during the week that when shit hits the fan, everyone leaves the room in soiled garments. Lekki Phase One, which was hitherto, renowned for being relatively safe due to the concentration of 'big boys' received gun-wielding August visitors. In broad day light, armed bandits locked down a part of Admiralty Way during a robbery operation. You can quickly watch the video here. 

I noticed many choice vehicles parked with doors ajar and long-vanished drivers. The images made me ponder on two things:

First, the meaninglessness and vanity of the many material things we chase as human beings. There it was. The Range Rover Sport did not fly over every other car to escape the robbers. The driver left it there and fled. Aiye dun je! (Life is sweet). It reminded me of the emptiness of it all. So it will be with judgment or death, whichever comes first. We will leave the material things and 'run' empty-handed. Just the way we weren't holding car keys when we were born into this world. Take heed.

The other thing is the commonality of the Nigerian problem. The wealthy people in Lekki, Asokoro and others build very high fences to keep the miscreants out but they forget that they can't remain locked in forever. The poverty and unemployment may not seem like their problem yet but there's a popular saying that 'one day, the poor will have nothing else to eat but the rich'. You will drive on the same roads after all. The rich and famous in Lekki got a feel of what people in Mile 2 and Igando have now learned to live with and they set social media agog with wailing. Nigeria has a problem. A stitch in time saves nine.

Unfortunately, five lives were prematurely cut short by bullets from these despicable elements. As reprehensible as their actions were, you just must wonder how they got so daring. They certainly had cohunes made of wrought iron to strike at such a time and in such an area. 

Interestingly, just like the online newspaper commentators, key officers of the PDP and APC have politicized the incident instead of reflecting on the avoidable deaths of innocent citizens and ease with which the operation and getaway were executed. Again, they have ignored the main issues and lessons and are bickering on inanities.

Sad.