Crude Oil: A Blessing Or A Curse?

Economics i'm told is the social science that analyzes the production, distribution and consumption of goods and services. I am a firm believer in getting round pegs in round holes and i certainly support getting technocrats to handle technical aspects of any project. I believe it saves time, energy and cost....maybe not always but most times. Nigeria is however a slightly more complex project, Economists abound and our Nigerian Universities churn out several of them annually. Mrs Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala is a seasoned Economist, i am told she graduated summa cum laude (meaning with the highest honors) from Harvard University and proceeded to MIT and has held even more seasoned positions in the IMF. I appreciate that she is probably one of Nigeria's best exports and maybe an authority in terms of global economics. Enter also, Mallam Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, an astute and career banker who also studied Economics from the Ahmadu Bello University Zaria. He also had his secondary education in my alma mater, Kings College Lagos, although during its glory days. Alot of us will be ever grateful to SLS for the banking reforms he kicked into motion in 2010 and 2011 that saw alot of pilfering bank executives face the slammers. Even if they are now roaming around scot free, we at least know how most of them amassed their wealth.

 I have introduced this bright Nigerian minds simply because they are key members of the Economic Management Team that finally approved and implemented the removal of fuel subsidy. A close examination of the two Economists and the different explanations they have tendered to Nigerians about the necessity of removing the subsidy is quite satisfying as far as i understand. However, what bothers me, is the fact that these Nigerians have diplomatically avoided the real issues that have sparked the continued protests all over Nigeria. Mrs Iweala insists that Nigeria will be too debt riddled in another 5years and may not be able to sustain its economy and has consistently made examples of European countries like Greece where there has been a total collapse of the economy. I agree with her that borrowing for consumption over and over many years without improving production will eventually leave any system bankrupt. I don't need to graduate egregia cum laude to understand the dynamics of lending, spending and borrowing. We all know by now that President Jonathan has become probably the most unpopular president the country ever had as evidenced by the amount of public outcry and the stalemate reached with labour on the issue of fuel subsidy. NOI persistently defends the removal of subsidy and insists its the best way forward. She is the Finance Minister and she knows how much Nigeria spends on the fat cows in the Executive and Legislative arms of Government. We understand our senators earn N245M annually  and there are over a hundred of them, not counting the even more populous House of Representatives. We also understand our President has 9 airplanes in his Presidential fleet and just approved money for another, while Mr James Cameron, the Prime Minister of England flies British Airways and does not have the luxury of a personal carrier, even Mr Barak Obama has just 2 aircraft servicing his office...this is the supposed Most Powerful Man in the world. Please note that these aircraft will fly on aviation fuel which Nigerians will pay for. We also understand that while Mr Cameron has 2 official vehicles, Mr Jonathan has at least 23! Incredible isn't it?

 Mr Sanusi made more sense when he tried to explain the fraud called fuel subsidy and again i understand and appreciate his point of view on the topic. He made example of Iran, a country where fuel is also not subsidized but the government does direct cash crediting of its citizenry and has advocated for such a scheme here in Nigeria in place of subsidy paid to the oil and gas players. He insists the 'cabal' continue to benefit greatly from the subsidy and continue to feed the monster called corruption in the oil and gas sector. I have a lot of respect for Mr Sanusi but i believe it was Mr Ron Paul who said 'when one gets in bed with government, one must expect the diseases it spreads'. SLS is currently putting himself in the eye of the storm and risks soiling his hitherto good name in the dirt called Nigerian Government. I hate that there is a cabal that seems too mighty and too rich and too deeply rooted for us to fight as a people and i hate it more that men of integrity like SLS cannot categorically take a stand against this cabal. We know who these people are, if not all, at least we know some. The saddest part of SLS and NOI's defence of the need to remove subsidy is that both of them have methodically and meticulously avoided exploring any other options of cutting costs and have insistently pointed at fuel subsidy. WHY? I want to remind us that NOI graduated from Harvard and MIT, how many civil servants in Nigeria now can afford to send their wards to such ivy league schools? SLS is a direct descendant of the Emir of Kano and his father was a top government official in the old Northern Region. Believe it or not these two people were born with silver spoons, whether they choose to accept it or not.

 They insist that we can save 1trillion naira from subsidy and they will not explore any other avenue of cutting costs and guarantee the continued existence of the entity called Nigeria. I am not a seasoned Economist but i know as a civil servant that when i am broke and the calender reads 10th of the month and i know pay day is still a few weeks away, i know i must reduce my expenses. How? I do not need to call SLS to ask if i should reduce the number of outings i go to save petrol or ping NOI to ask if i should eat at Mama Put instead of a 3 course cuisine at Oriental Hotel?(Not that i eat there anyway). It is simply common sense! The government seems to be intentionally myopic and will not hear of any other options but to jack up fuel prices. GEJ got on national television and said 'he feels the pain of Nigerian masses'....how dare him? For a man who reports say has not used his own money to buy petrol in Nigeria since 1996 when he became an NDDC board member. He also says 'if he was in our SHOES, he'll react the same way'. The SHOE matter comes up again, Ebele,my friend, you have mentioned shoes again. Is there anything with you and shoes? This statement shows us now that really, you now have shoes! My President also said he has ordered for 1600 buses for 160 million Nigerians....how incredibly smart of him! I hope these buses will pick each person up from his doorstep and drop him off at his destination. He also generously decided to pay our salaries by the 20th of every month....i honestly still don't understand what that is supposed to achieve but i want to assume i am the one who has poor mentation and comprehension. He finally said he has ordered a 25% paycut in the BASIC salary of government officials and a reduction to the barest minimum of foreign trips. Ironically, Mr Jonathan was at a gala in South Africa to celebrate with South Africans, who are currently not trooping out in the streets...how sensitive!

 Mahatma Gandhi said 'I will not let anyone walk through my mind with dirty feet'. Nigerians must not let technocrats like NOI and SLS bamboozle us with figures and statistics. In as much as we know that our 'very brave' President is not likely to help us fight this cabal, we demand that he steps up and actually BE a Commander-In-Chief. The man has the entire Armed Forces at his disposal yet we are shackled by a group of sharks termed the 'Cabal'. Is this an Italian movie flick? Does it mean that the some Nigerians are above the Nigerian Law? Be a man Sir...Nigeria cannot be ruled with kid gloves, step on toes, bite some fingers, show Nigerians you have the guts to fight for them and see if any protests will follow your subsidy removal. Nigerians are emotionally battered and physically bruised people, we have had our minds continually, mercilessly and persistently raped by consecutive governments. For once, be a Hero Sir, show us you are an Otueke fisherman's son! GEJ has however started fidgeting, he yesterday approved a pay rise for the Armed Forces and offered to pay 4 months arrears. Fear that is palpable does not need any explanation. He is afraid of a military uprising and possible takeover and has attempted to 'bribe' them into not considering a takeover. In all this crisis, i'm sure one thing is quite clear to alot of on looking Nigerians, it is clear that Ebele Jonathan has hilariously imbecilic advisers. The timing of his decisions shows his mind's view and perspective of issues is quite narrow and myopic. He needs to sit down and ask himself very pressing questions and ask for divine help in retracing his steps because believe me, he has really missed his way. In the last 48hours, he has entered the record books as the most insulted leader Nigeria has ever had, he has not helped his cause anyway, his gun totting cretins called policemen have gone ahead to open fire on peaceful protesters. They have left a trail of blood and bones for GEJ to explain. He has declared states of emergency in a few northern states, but i hope his daft advisers have informed him that the Occupy Nigeria protests are gathering momentum and he might need to deploy more troops to quench the uprising. To NOI and SLS, i say leave us alone, let us be broke in 5years, maybe then and only then will politicians leave us to rule ourselves for the love of humanity and social justice and not for gross larceny. Maybe that is the point we need to reach in order to get rid of these callous fellows, when the government is broke, they'll dump it and walk away....we the masses are used to the suffering, we are already providing light, security, water and other amenities for ourselves, we have nothing to lose. It's the politicians who sit around to discuss gay marriages and the national anthem sang in tenor and earn 450M annually for such 'intelligent' debates that will feel the brunt of the economic collapse.

 Now, to solutions that do not require raising the cost of a sachet of pure water to 10naira and transport fares by 100%....Can we sell off 8 of our 9 presidential jets and leave GEJ with one airplane to globetrott? Even with 1 airplane, he is still the envy of Mr David Cameron, who still has to fly with the National Carrier. Can we stop allowances and grants to our senators and legislators? Can we start to pay them the same salary as stipulated by the Federal Civil Service for Level 17 officers? Can we reduce the President's gluttonous appetite by reducing his feeding allowance to about a hundredth of the 1 billion naira he wants to spend in 2012? Should we even feed him since we are paying him salary already? I am a civil servant and nobody pays me 'feeding allowance' after the salary i get every 30days. Can we stop frivolous allowances for furniture, cars, travel, food, newspapers, gardening, and the likes we pay monthly? Can we have fewer ministers and special advisers and aides? What is the function of a Minister and a Minister of State in the same Ministry that has Driectors and Perm Secs. The States already have their own Commissioners anyway. Can we ask the EFCC and the Military to round up the 'Cabal'...we know them even if they are wealthy. They own oil blocks, oil vessels and distribution chains. Can we seize some of these assets and render them abit less powerful? they are not spirits, they are Otedola, Dangote, Jimoh Ibrahim, Dantata, Adenuga, Atiku and several others. Let's even start with one person and see if the others won't flee when they see the seriousness with which we are dealing with their like. I am not an Economist but i have a feeling we'll find a few billions of naira and dollars lying around somewhere to execute capital projects that really benefit the people. We haven't reached the point where we need techincal know-how of macroeconomical indices and dynamics of NOI and SLS, when that point comes, we'll summon them.

'Experience has shown, that even under the best forms of government those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny'- Thomas Jefferson. Goodluck Jonathan has said he will risk civil unrest to ensure his policy sails, he has allowed extreme dullards called policeman take the lives of innocent protesting Nigerians who he solicited votes from. He has taken the lives of people whom he promised 'fresh air', now their lungs are filled with everything but fresh air....seems more like tear gas from what i observe. Tyrants are not born, they are made! We have one in the making now, he's a Christian and he wears bowler hats! Thank you to all the discerning and insightful men of God that anointed him for this position.

 Finally, Ebele, you probably didn't study a lot of History while in the department of Zoology at the University of Port Harcourt but i advice you to go back and read history from the time of Alexander the Great to most recently Hosni Mubarak, Laurent Gbagbo and Muammar Gahddafi....it'll show a recurring decimal!

Vox Populi...Vox Dei

#OccupyNigeria!

Emeka Wogu: A Reflection of GEJ's Administration.

A sagacious French poet, Nicolas Boileau-Despréaux, once said 'Every fool finds a greater one to admire them'. Chief Emeka Ngozichineke Wogu, a federal minister in charge of Labour and Productivity and a member of the Federal Executive Council, has without an iota of doubt proven to the world, that he is indeed the greatest of all fools. 


On the 3rd of January 2012, while reacting to the pockets of protests that greeted the removal of fuel subsidy in the country, Chief Wogu, on national TV said most of the protesters were 'instigated' and most of the protesters did not even know what they were on the roads protesting about. 


It worries me that people like Chief Wogu are at the helm of affairs in a country riddled with intellectuals. Surely he must have had birth asphyxia and the unfortunate sequela of cerebral palsy at his birth. His statement that the masses who thronged the streets to protest the rise in fuel prices did not know the reason they were carrying placards shows that the Council that approved the removal of fuel subsidy is filled with intellectually stunted fellows. I won't even waste effort on the fellow who appointed them and heads this council.


Chief Wogu's defence of his employer and probable mentor's action proves Boileau's thinking correctly, as he has shown he is indeed a greater fool than the powers that appointed him. Initially, i had decided to let him slide after a friend asked if i have nothing to blog about the fellow called Wogu. I initially felt such a cretin as him was not worth my time and effort but again, i thought about the big picture and it frightened me that each time this council sits, all the participants had about the same IQ as Chief Wogu. We are indeed in alot of trouble in this entity called Nigeria.


A common, though not classical, symptom of Cerebral Palsy and Severe Mental Retardation is slurred speech. It is however also a common feature in Acute Alcohol intoxication. I am yet to fully decipher which of these two clinical conditions Wogu suffers from, i will however not be surprised if he is afflicted with some element of both. If you by chance missed the interview, you probably will not fully understand what i mean by him having slurred speech. I do hope he decides to publicly display his wanton and gross stupidity again soon for all who missed the first episode. How can a 46 year old man and a titled Ibo chief say people who now pay 1,400 for 10 liters of petrol to fuel their 'i pass my neighbor' instead of 650, do not know what they are protesting for. That people who now pay twice the fare to reach their places of work when their salaries remain static and severely stunted do not know the reasons for the protests. Mr Wogu definitely needs a Mental State Examination, he truly lacks not just insight, but also common sense.


I however understand his plight, he probably had no shoes too. I understand he schooled in Aba at a very early age in his life. I have had the privilege of visiting Aba a couple of times and the state of the city is truly reflected in Wogu's mind. I strongly believe it is lethal and destructive to have a child grow during the formative years in such a place. He is also, albeit unfortunately, a Barrister having 'graduated' from the Imo State University with LLB and obtained BL from the Nigerian Law School. I have a lot of learned legal friends and acquaintances and none of the several i have met have struck me with such level of mental impoverishment.


Not surprisingly, he was first appointed as a Federal minister in April 2010 by....i'll leave you to guess who was 'smart' enough to appoint such a simpleton. Wogu and his colleagues in the FEC have said they will not shift on the fuel subsidy removal and Nigerians must pay the price for their ineptitude. He even says it is temporary and fuel prices will come down shortly. Is he aware of the Iran situation? Does he know that by the time the EU starts its proposed shut-out on Iranian oil that global oil prices will rise? Is my learned minister also aware that the value of the dollar goes a long way in oil pricing globally. Does he need to be reminded of the naira's waning fortune as compared to the dollar? Chief Wogu is the Nwandiala of Aba, i suggest he visits the shrines in Aba every now and then and throw cowries and shells with red cloth if he feels he is not mentally equipped enough to continue as a minister. I honestly do not want to think of how much he earns as bonuses and allowances and what such amounts could do for a a lot of fledgling entrepreneurs i know at the moment in Lagos. 


Finally, i'll end by quoting Josh Billings who said ''Take all the fools out of this world and they wouldn't be any fun living in it, or profit''. I guess we need people like Wogu, maybe not in government but at the Ozone or Genesis Deluxe Cinemas. Chief Barrister Emeka Wogu, its called a BRAIN...SHUT UP AND USE IT!

Jonah...Oh Jonah!

 Otueke is a relatively small fishing village in Southern Nigeria. Until recently, it was an unknown town in Bayelsa and most Nigerians, except those from the axis, had never heard of Otueke. Personally anyway, I had never heard of it even though i spent almost 7 years in medical school in neighboring Port Harcourt Rivers State. Then enter, 'Dr' 'Goodluck' Ebele Jonathan and Otueke would have its fortunes changed for the worst. Kindly note that the 'Dr' and 'Goodluck' in quotation are not typographical errors. I would prefer to use the word 'misnomer'. I will try to elucidate as i go on.

 On January 1 2012, President Jonathan decided the most thoughtful and sensible gift he could give a set of 'bombing weary' Nigerians was a hike in pump price of PMS. Being a Doctor myself, albeit not honorary, i feel a lot of shame by this man's pronouncement. I am made to understand he has a first degree in Zoology and a masters degree in Fisheries and a Ph.D from my alma mater. Again the shame i feel is unparalleled. Doctors from the age of Hippocrates are known to be mentally sound human beings and have an unquenchable thirst for knowledge. Ebele Jonathan has not particularly spoken or acted like a mentally sound and socially balanced being. A lot of parody has been generated by our First Lady's grammatical prowess. I have nothing against Her Excellency but what astonishes me is her mental bankruptcy and aridity. She has all of Nigeria's resources at her disposal and yet she seems too self absorbed to explore the option of enrolling in a suitable night school. Since Dame has insisted, on her own volition, to remain in the public eye and speak publicly at every chance she gets, i think it is only fair she does so safely and not at the expense of the hearing centres in our brains.

 

 I have talked about Dame here because i want to talk about the quality of the man who has spousal relations with her. I have continuously asked myself how Dame challenges Ebele intellectually. As a doctor, i am certain, i would not pursue a relationship with a female who is incapable of engaging me in an intellectual conversation about any subject at all without making me wonder if my ears need wax softeners. Even the Good Book says 'Do not be unequally yoked', it means the Good Lord appreciates the importance of this concept. Is it the safe to assume that Dame and Ebele are equally yoked? It is certainly looking likely.

Now to the second misnomer 'Goodluck'. We often hear people say 'what's in a name?'. A lot of times, i respond 'A LOT'. A lot of Nigerians had believed GEJ was our knight in shinning armor. A popular record label even sang jingles during the campaign period, very melodious tunes at that and he promised that Nigerian youth would be 'LOLing' soon. He has certainly brought everything BUT goodluck to Nigeria. Under him, we have bombings every alternate day in Nigeria and it strongly gives credit to Nigeria's rating as a terrorist nation in company of Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan and Pakistan where bombs can be purchased on the streets.Under his 'goodluck charm',we now have to pay mad prices for PMS. The man is definitely lacking any goodluck.

 Anybody who knows fishermen,the Ijaw and Bayelsans knows they have a high affinity for strong locally brewed vodka a.k.a 'kai-kai, local snuff a.k.a 'tabaa' and an even higher affinity for voluptuous women. Ebele has exhibited traits in the last week that are highly and classically suggestive of someone who starts and ends a typical working day taking vodka and snuff. His incredible fuel subsidy removal policy has shown that indeed we are in a ship being steered by a blind and perennially 'high' sailor. I hope the University of Port Harcourt, that awarded the myriad degrees can stand and defend this man's intellectual capacity. A popular producer whose record label produced the pre-election jingles today allegedly tweeted this 'i have never regretted any decision in my life but that my vote added to what brought this government to power is one i regret from my heart'. That this music producer and the top selling artiste on his label took part in the ridicule GEJ turned the pre-election presidential debate into is also not news. I only pray they have good explanations for their unborn children as to how much they traded their conscience for.

 

A certain 'Man of God' laid hands on GEJ prior to the elections and 'anointed' him to lead us to our 'promise-land'. Fortunately and unfortunately, this man is well respected and oversees a very large congregation. I also hope he has good and inspiring words of consolation for his teeming congregation when they start to feel the brunt of the fuel price hike. The Nigerian factor has crept into the church and whether we like it or not, we Christians voted en masse for this man (i didn't anyway). We vehemently asked for him because the other contenders were Islamists and we swapped objectivity for sentiments. We all aided in the creation of this monster and now karma has returned, dressed regally. We now go around greeting each other in the ever familiar phrase 'It is well'...but guess what Nigeria, it is NOT well! Look at the number of people Boko Haram has killed, look at the protests that have broken out in various parts of the nation, look at the state of Nigerian hospitals and universities! All is NOT well.

Jonathan has said he is ready to risk public disobedience to ensure his fuel subsidy removal stands. Mr Reuben Abati, his aide on media has said 'leadership is not about populism' and that the people must pay for the inefficiency and gross imbecility of the current administration. The same Reuben Abati who before 'God answered his prayers' used to tongue-lash government and its officials and its policies via his column in the Guardian titled 'Crossroads'.... Indeed everyone has a price. GEJ has said without fuel subsidy removal, this government will be broke in a few years and i again question his intellectual capacity. It is not rocket science, if you spend 1 billion naira annually on food for 2 households and 20 million dollars as annual international travelling expenses for the Vice President and several millions of naira for newspapers and periodicals for the same Vice President. How will the government not be broke. As far as i am concerned, the extra 1 trillion naira Mr Jonathan believes is subsidy is just more money for the cabal to share and he will give account one day, if not to Nigerians, to God. 

 Finally, i woke up this morning wishing Jonathan's fisherman father gave him shoes. Apparently, his lack of shoes and long distance bare-feet trekking during childhood made him a bit dysfunctional. We now have to suffer for the lack of shoes as he seems to now have a shoe fetish and insists on spending 1 trillion naira on shoes for him and the cabal. 

 Eventually, our children will ask 'what were my parents looking at'